Truths and Promises

"No cuentan cuentos si no son verdad, ni prometen lo que no van a cumplir"

("They don't tell stories if they're not true, or make promises they won't keep")



These are two lines from a song. The song is less than memorable, but the lines have stuck. For some reason they seem like rules to live by: tell the truth and keep your promises. I personally don't take the first one too seriously. Not because I think the truth is worthless, but because I value lies. Not just my own, but other people's too. The lies we tell to protect ourselves, the lies that don't hurt others, I have nothing against. It's when lies hurt someone else that they begin to be problematic.

I have been lying about being late my whole life. It all started when I was 9 or 10. Our neighbours had a dog, an Alsatian, a gorgeous creature. His name was Agus, and his owner let him out every morning. Agus was a fantastic dog. He always came back, rarely got into fights with other dogs. He died of leishmaniosis when he was 7 years old, but that's another sadder story. I loved him, and he liked me quite a lot.

One morning, we were heading off to school, and Agus saw us as we left. He started following the car. Our drive to school usually took about fifteen minutes, but that day, about five minutes in, we had to stop, put Agus in the car and drive back to leave him at home. He was chasing us in the street and might have gotten run over by another car.

I wasn't late for school that day, but the story has served me (in a couple of occasions) as a fantastic excuse for being late. No one has questioned it. It's just original enough not to be counted as one in a long list of excuses, it contains a good action, and (because it's rooted in truth) it rings true.

That's the single most important thing when telling a story: invent as much as you like. Tell your wildest dreams, your darkest perversions, your scariest nightmares. But make them yours. Make sure they are deeply rooted in experience, that there is a bite of truth in every single story you tell. It is not just important, it is necessary.

A friend once said to me that he didn't read fiction, because he had enough with the lies he was told every day. I didn't say anything. I tend to respect people's stupidity. But he was wrong in thinking that fiction means lies. Good fiction is an exercise in telling the truth. The author's own truth, for sure, but the truth. Anything that isn't the truth, anything that is an imitation of the truth but not the truth itself, will unfortunately not be good.

That is why I can never write the story Deyanira, the princess who had a snake as her best friend, and her first day of school (the diskette is lost, must be somewhere in the attic, I think I made it to chapter three), but I could write Trotski's story. That's why I can't tell you about aliens, but I can tell you that there is a witch. She has a pumpkin head that looks like it's computer animated, and a broom. And she tried to kill me on top of a tower once. And that was the last real nightmare I had when I was 11 years old.

Promises are different. I don't understand people who break their promises, because it's easy not to make them. Don't give your word, you don't need you, few people expect you to. And if you do, only do it if you mean it. Otherwise it's worthless.

People say "you must keep your promises" and what they mean is that without them you're worth nothing. I say "don't make promises unless you mean to keep them", because all I ask of anyone is that they don't betray their own word.

In general, I couldn't care less if you lied to me (unless the lie is designed to hurt me, or to hide something from me that will hurt me), but I will probably never trust you again if you break a promise. Not because you gave me your word, but because I never asked you to give it.

The last thing I say is: promises should be given freely and truly. One should never ask for a promise. After all, promises are like drinks: if you've had to ask for it, they weren't buying you a drink, and if they weren't buying you a drink, it means you owe them one back.